Beautiful, Painful & Sympathetic
She Doesn't Need to See the Menu 她無需看菜單
1. I am watching you get sick.
1. 我眼睜睜看著你生病
The whites of your eyes are becoming yellow yolks;
你的眼白變得猶如蛋黃
cheeks hang like grocery bags.
乾癟的臉頰彷彿塑膠袋
You make diets of day planners. No time to eat with a stuffed calendar.
節食是你的日課 沒空進食 光是排滿行程就飽了
Live off scheduled glamour.
全靠 未來預定的魅力死撐著
Meals are powdered hot chocolate packets.
熱巧克力粉包就是你的一餐
No marshmallows; just water.
不加棉花糖 用熱水泡
Breakfast is plain oatmeal.
早餐 只吃燕麥片
No milk; flavored with tap water.
不加奶 佐以白湯
2. To invite happiness inside him,
2. 為了使內在充滿快樂
Vincent Van Gogh drank paint of yellow hues.
梵谷選擇飲用黃色顏料
You do mad things for happiness, too.
為了快樂 你也會做出瘋狂之舉
Vomit like an after school sport;
嘔吐 就是你的課後休閒
Your teeth blister. Bathe in sea salt to dehydrate water weight.
你的牙齒起泡 以海鹽沐浴使自己脫水減重
3. Eating disorders are very in.
3. 飲食失調現正流行
Like kale, like skinny jeans, like old Hollywood glamour-
正如羽衣甘藍 如窄管褲 如舊好萊塢魅力
and don’t you dare bring up Marilyn Monroe.
別想舉瑪麗蓮夢露作為反例
Recent studies show her frame was only one third of what you think.
最新研究顯示 她的骨架其實只有你以為的1/3
4. Shrivel your stomach until it takes a single granola bar to feel full.
4. 把你的胃縮小到僅需一條穀物棒就飽
Have NyQuil for a midnight snack.
消夜就來顆安眠感冒藥
With pale pupils and unplugged irises,
蒼白的瞳孔和渙散的虹膜
the only language you communicate in is numbers.
與你溝通的唯一方式 只剩下體重計的數字
You are a human recycling bin.
你就像個人形垃圾回收桶
Quit blaming your hometown and decomposing skin.
別把自己分解的皮膚怪到家鄉身上了
If you’re not recovering, you are dying.
若不恢復 你就是在向死亡邁進
5. There was another girl in our grade who got sick about the same time you did,
5. 同學年還有另一個女生跟你差不多時間開始顯病
but she went to the hospital real quick because she was already thin to begin with.
但她很快就被送醫 因為她一開始就很瘦了
6. You were not thin to begin with.
6. 你最初的身材並不瘦
You were fat, and now you’re evaporating,
你很肥 而現在你正在逐漸蒸發
so everybody is congratulating you on getting “healthy.”
所以大家都爭相道賀你"健康"的新生活方式
You are not an illness, but an inspiration.
你並非隱疾 而是大家的榜樣
Your father still carries your before-and-after photo in his wallet.
你的父親仍驕傲地隨身攜帶你減肥前後的對照
Your disease is a smashing sensation.
你的疾病是場大成功
7. Friend, I am so sorry.
7. 朋友 我很遺憾告訴你
You too, are sick.
你 病了
Your messiah Kate Moss insists her physique is an achievable ambition,
你的救世主凱特摩絲堅稱 她的身材是人人都做得到的目標
“Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.”…
"沒有什麼食物比消瘦的身材更美味"
Girl, she’s never had Nutella. Do not trust her,
傻女孩 她這輩子從沒吃過巧克力榛果醬
her two-faced dental care, or her fur pelt.
別相信她雙面的美齒整形 或她的皮草
Anorexics develop a hair all over to thaw their glacial bodies,
厭食症使她們冰河般的軀體解凍 長出一層毛
called lanugo. The cold won’t let you go.
那叫做胎毛 但寒冷還是不會讓你好過
8. Veins bulging like a pop up book, I am watching you get sick.
8. 你的血管突出如立體書 我眼見你日漸衰弱
Mistake tracing paper for your skin. I am watching you get sick.
將描圖紙誤認是你薄薄的皮膚 我眼見你日漸衰弱
When the blackouts start and your pulse gets slippery,
當你開始頻頻失去意識 脈搏逐漸變得平滑
wallpaper your interior with laxatives. I am watching you get sick.
以瀉藥妝點體內 我眼見你日漸衰弱
Read so much, your body trusts it is full on authors, not high on hunger.
大量閱讀 你的身體以為因知識而充實 而非因飢餓狂喜
I am watching you get sick.
我眼見你日漸衰弱
9. One day, you will learn.
9. 終有一天 你會懂
The natural pigments will return-
自然的色澤會重返你臉龐
no more yellow skin, no blue fingernails,
不再是蠟黃膚色 或發青指甲
no scarlet scratch in your throat matching the raw nick on your middle finger.
你的喉嚨不會再有以中指催吐時留下的腥紅刮傷
Make amends with the kitchen.
你會與廚房重修舊好
Your face will glow like a television.
你的面頰宛如電視 煥發榮光
You will get full again.
你會再度吃飽
Be able to finish a meal.
能夠滿足的用餐
You will become a writer.
你將成為一名作家
One day, I hope I’ll be able to finish this poem and say-
希望有一天我能完成這首詩 並對你說
10. I am watching you heal.
10. 我親眼見證你的康復
I am watching you get better.
我要親眼看著你 越來越好
– Blythe Baird
中譯 by Bone
1. 我眼睜睜看著你生病
The whites of your eyes are becoming yellow yolks;
你的眼白變得猶如蛋黃
cheeks hang like grocery bags.
乾癟的臉頰彷彿塑膠袋
You make diets of day planners. No time to eat with a stuffed calendar.
節食是你的日課 沒空進食 光是排滿行程就飽了
Live off scheduled glamour.
全靠 未來預定的魅力死撐著
Meals are powdered hot chocolate packets.
熱巧克力粉包就是你的一餐
No marshmallows; just water.
不加棉花糖 用熱水泡
Breakfast is plain oatmeal.
早餐 只吃燕麥片
No milk; flavored with tap water.
不加奶 佐以白湯
2. To invite happiness inside him,
2. 為了使內在充滿快樂
Vincent Van Gogh drank paint of yellow hues.
梵谷選擇飲用黃色顏料
You do mad things for happiness, too.
為了快樂 你也會做出瘋狂之舉
Vomit like an after school sport;
嘔吐 就是你的課後休閒
Your teeth blister. Bathe in sea salt to dehydrate water weight.
你的牙齒起泡 以海鹽沐浴使自己脫水減重
3. Eating disorders are very in.
3. 飲食失調現正流行
Like kale, like skinny jeans, like old Hollywood glamour-
正如羽衣甘藍 如窄管褲 如舊好萊塢魅力
and don’t you dare bring up Marilyn Monroe.
別想舉瑪麗蓮夢露作為反例
Recent studies show her frame was only one third of what you think.
最新研究顯示 她的骨架其實只有你以為的1/3
4. Shrivel your stomach until it takes a single granola bar to feel full.
4. 把你的胃縮小到僅需一條穀物棒就飽
Have NyQuil for a midnight snack.
消夜就來顆安眠感冒藥
With pale pupils and unplugged irises,
蒼白的瞳孔和渙散的虹膜
the only language you communicate in is numbers.
與你溝通的唯一方式 只剩下體重計的數字
You are a human recycling bin.
你就像個人形垃圾回收桶
Quit blaming your hometown and decomposing skin.
別把自己分解的皮膚怪到家鄉身上了
If you’re not recovering, you are dying.
若不恢復 你就是在向死亡邁進
5. There was another girl in our grade who got sick about the same time you did,
5. 同學年還有另一個女生跟你差不多時間開始顯病
but she went to the hospital real quick because she was already thin to begin with.
但她很快就被送醫 因為她一開始就很瘦了
6. You were not thin to begin with.
6. 你最初的身材並不瘦
You were fat, and now you’re evaporating,
你很肥 而現在你正在逐漸蒸發
so everybody is congratulating you on getting “healthy.”
所以大家都爭相道賀你"健康"的新生活方式
You are not an illness, but an inspiration.
你並非隱疾 而是大家的榜樣
Your father still carries your before-and-after photo in his wallet.
你的父親仍驕傲地隨身攜帶你減肥前後的對照
Your disease is a smashing sensation.
你的疾病是場大成功
7. Friend, I am so sorry.
7. 朋友 我很遺憾告訴你
You too, are sick.
你 病了
Your messiah Kate Moss insists her physique is an achievable ambition,
你的救世主凱特摩絲堅稱 她的身材是人人都做得到的目標
“Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.”…
"沒有什麼食物比消瘦的身材更美味"
Girl, she’s never had Nutella. Do not trust her,
傻女孩 她這輩子從沒吃過巧克力榛果醬
her two-faced dental care, or her fur pelt.
別相信她雙面的美齒整形 或她的皮草
Anorexics develop a hair all over to thaw their glacial bodies,
厭食症使她們冰河般的軀體解凍 長出一層毛
called lanugo. The cold won’t let you go.
那叫做胎毛 但寒冷還是不會讓你好過
8. Veins bulging like a pop up book, I am watching you get sick.
8. 你的血管突出如立體書 我眼見你日漸衰弱
Mistake tracing paper for your skin. I am watching you get sick.
將描圖紙誤認是你薄薄的皮膚 我眼見你日漸衰弱
When the blackouts start and your pulse gets slippery,
當你開始頻頻失去意識 脈搏逐漸變得平滑
wallpaper your interior with laxatives. I am watching you get sick.
以瀉藥妝點體內 我眼見你日漸衰弱
Read so much, your body trusts it is full on authors, not high on hunger.
大量閱讀 你的身體以為因知識而充實 而非因飢餓狂喜
I am watching you get sick.
我眼見你日漸衰弱
9. One day, you will learn.
9. 終有一天 你會懂
The natural pigments will return-
自然的色澤會重返你臉龐
no more yellow skin, no blue fingernails,
不再是蠟黃膚色 或發青指甲
no scarlet scratch in your throat matching the raw nick on your middle finger.
你的喉嚨不會再有以中指催吐時留下的腥紅刮傷
Make amends with the kitchen.
你會與廚房重修舊好
Your face will glow like a television.
你的面頰宛如電視 煥發榮光
You will get full again.
你會再度吃飽
Be able to finish a meal.
能夠滿足的用餐
You will become a writer.
你將成為一名作家
One day, I hope I’ll be able to finish this poem and say-
希望有一天我能完成這首詩 並對你說
10. I am watching you heal.
10. 我親眼見證你的康復
I am watching you get better.
我要親眼看著你 越來越好
– Blythe Baird
